Captive ~

Crumbling on the inside
Barely breathing
The pain ripping me apart
Every fiber of my being screaming
Heartache never wavers
My soul cries in silence
Tears fighting to escape
A wall built of fear
Never showing vulnerability
Shutting out the world
Safeguarding my soul
The secrets hidden within
Penetrating my thoughts
Poisoning my blood
Fighting for release
But confined tightly by these walls
Restrained and protected
Forever sheltered by the darkness
Holding me Captive…

Copyright ©2016 –ND White

Sacrifice ~

(For a dear friend, you know who you are…please don’t lose yourself…)

Free to be himself but wanting to be accepted
Yearning for a man’s touch
He has tasted that fruit
For that is who he truly is

Afraid of societal norms
Pretending to be someone he’s not
Only not to hurt the one that he loves
For she has loved him and accepted him
They call each other their own

But when he is taken by slumber
And his soul finally rests
His heart turns to another
And his soul reaches out
But not for her

Copyright ©2016 –ND White

His Far Away Angel ~

She smiles
He chuckles
A beautiful sight
A humbling sound
Neither to be seen or heard
Only to be felt, through the words on the pages

Secrets shared
A connection unbroken
Tied by depth and uncertainty
Things he won’t say out loud
But to her he bears all
Whispering to her soul
She has become his angel in the dark

Her wings have opened
For few she lets in
His soul speaks to her
She answers
Raw Honesty
Opening up completely
Unable to pull away

A bond between two souls
Separated by distance
Brought together by raging winds
Imperfections of both
Beautifully entwined
Destined to clash together ~

Copyright ©2016 –ND White

Beautiful Tragedy ~

Come out and play.
Not now, maybe not ever.
Not ever? But you have already, so many times.
I can’t, I shouldn’t.
But you can, and you should.
But why?
Because you need to.
Who says?
You do. You say it all the time.
You’re wrong.
Am I?
No my dear, you’re just in denial.
Explain, please.
It consumes you. Every thought you have while awake, then it haunts your dreams.
Go on…
Without it you’ll break. But it will break you.
No it won’t. It promised.
But it already has.
No! Stop it. You’re wrong…
I’m not wrong. Your soul is shattered. Piece by broken piece, you bleed as its words slice through you. An illusion full of venomous lies that keeps you trapped by a beautiful tragedy…
That is becoming you.

Copyright ©2016 –ND White

Set Me Free ~

Hand in hand, we walk to the water’s edge
Silence between us, full of unspoken words
Our thoughts echoing in the wind
Raindrops threatening to fall
You grip my hand tighter
Tears fill my eyes while gazing into the storm clouds above
Water washes over our feet
I don’t remember getting this close
Turning my head slowly to look at you
Your stare fixated on the waters swell
A single tear escapes down my cheek
Trying to find the words, but my lips cannot speak
My breath catches, the frigid water snaking around my core
How did we get here?
Hands now immersed, my fingers start to slip
The ache in my chest intensifies
Drowning in my emotions
Struggling not to be swept away
Do I break free to spare you?
Icy raindrops begin to sting my skin
Whilst you stand there, untouched, emotionless
Anguish sweeps through me
Struggling to stay grounded
Afraid to let go
Pulling from your grip
I take my last breath
Immersing myself in the dark waters
Allowing its crushing weight to swallow me
To consume me
To set me free ~

Copyright ©2016 –ND White

Autumn Wind ~

Watching the autumn leaves fall,
the sun glistens on the edges,
close to dusk,
nightfall is near.
A tear escapes down her cheek
as she stares into the fading sun.
Hugging her body tightly,
her arms absorb the shivering
that threatens to unravel her.
As she inhales deeply
the frigid air burns her
from the inside out.
She welcomes the bite,
the icy sting in her veins
is what makes her feel more alive.
A feeling she hasn’t felt since it happened.
That moment when everything changed.
She closes her eyes
as more tears threaten to make their escape.
The cold wind picks up
as the sun goes to sleep.
A single leaf catches her cheek
before blowing past her.
She tries to reach for it,
wishing the wind would
just carry her away too…

Copyright ©2015 –ND White

Reflection ~

She dances on her toes
Eyes closed
Oblivious to the possibilities within her reach
Shards of glass broken beneath her
Each step leaving behind
Traces of her bleeding soul
She falters and starts to slip
A faint cry escapes her blood-red lips
She wants nothing more
Than for someone to catch her
A trusted soul
Not withered or broken
Alone in this world
She is trapped in the darkness surrounding her
Screaming for an escape
To a place that does not exist
Crashing down
Her body falls
Shattered dreams paint the walls
Tears escape
From her empty eyes
As she tries to pull herself up again
Broken and bleeding
She is forced to see
Gasping at her shattered reflection…
Who is this girl, staring back at me?

Copyright ©2015 –ND White

Companion/Response Poetry by C.S. Bailey and Myself ~

Companion poems or Response Poetry (either way you want to look at it…) is a great collaborative exercise that the very talented author C.S. Bailey and I have decided to work together on. I kicked it off and then he followed. So here it is, I hope you enjoy it. Don’t forget to check out his site for more! ( )

Uncertain Fate ~
Standing on the edge of the sandy reef
The wind tangles her raven black hair
She stares across the vast sea
The moonlight glistening
Salty drops of sea mist dance across her skin
She shivers and inhales deeply
Pulling her red cloak tighter
Protecting her ivory canvas
She smiles as a single tear escapes
Staining her cheek before it falls to the salty ocean below
Her heart aches for him
Her lips desire to kiss him
Her body burns to feel his protecting touch
She closes her eyes
Her breath catches
Her body relaxes as her delicate arms rise
Taking a chance on an uncertain fate
Her knees weaken
She plunges herself into the turbulent sea
Hoping it carries her across the waters
Washing her ashore
Where he will rescue her
And breathe life into her, once again.

Copyright ©2015 –ND White

Certain Sadness by C.S. Bailey
The cliff edge is windy and cold.
Italicizing his life with suicide, an act he considers bold.
His existence has been full of tribulations,
Full of circumstantial indignations!
Yet here is, standing tall.
Braver than most before his final fall!
Squinting eyes cast out upon the vast seas as he takes his final breaths.
Taking in the beauty, before his timely death!
Yet through the wind, another soul he sees.
A red cloak blowing in the wind, raven black hair and ivory skin.
Is it an illusion?
A dream!
Perhaps a torment for his sin!
Then she jumps!
Straight in to the abyss!
Should he leave her?
Should he save her?
He knows not what to do.
Surely it’s madness?
His heart pounds as he takes the plunge.
Saving them both from an uncertain sadness?

Control ~

Always fighting for control
That need to be in charge
To be perfect
But who are you perfect for?
The judgmental stares of those around you?
Tiptoeing on shards of glass
Dancing around the edges
Hoping not to misstep
Cutting yourself
Bleeding while leaving a path behind you
Adding another scar to your tainted flesh
Whose reflection do you see when looking in the mirror?
Those hazel eyes staring back at you
Reflective pools of pain
Fooling you into seeing what isn’t there
You cover yourself, ashamed
Where is this beauty that others claim to see?
Why can’t you see it?
It’s there, looking back at you.
Deceiving you
Bending your will to break
Your strength is weakening
Hiding behind the hurt
You only want to be perfect
You only want to be you
But you’re not really in control
Not anymore
The painful truth is consuming you
Your secret is killing you
As you purge…
Your body quakes as your soul screams
Chasing that high
To deal with the pain
Because in reality,
It. Controls. You…

Copyright ©2015 –ND White

I Have Lived ~

2014 is coming to an end, and what a year this has been. I could spend hours writing about all that I have experienced; things that I have done. (And I admit that there are just some things that I will never tell *winks*.) However, instead of rambling on about this years mishaps, mistakes, and accomplishments; I am leaving you with my final post in 2014. I think it sums my year up quite nicely. Xx

I have hurt
And struggled to breathe.
I have smiled
Fell in love
And started to feel again.
I have trusted
Only to be lied to.
I have fallen
And was completely broken.
I have fought
And started creating myself.
I have experienced life.
I have lived.

Copyright ©2014 –ND White